REAL TALK: Role Models are Better than Super Models

I'd rather be a role model than a super model. 

There's something much more to a girl photographed because of what she has been through and what she has accomplished, than a girl photographed just because of the way she looks. 

Photo (c) Dek Carillo

REAL TALK: Power of One's "The Set-Apart Girl"

There's this beautiful phrase that seems to haunt me for a lifetime and will probably go on following me until forever— those words are perfectly tailored together that I consistently wake up in the morning with this in mind and sleep at night praying deeply for it.

This has become my heart's deepest desire and my life's battle-cry...

To be "Like a lily among the thorns" 

elstika.com

If you take this phrase into the context of Song of Solomon 2:2 (where it was originally written,) you would find that it revolves around the themes intimacy, romance, and Godly love, BUT God impressed this verse in my heart in a TOTALLY DIFFERENT light—which focuses merely and only on the "lily among the thorns" itself—the woman individually.

We have come to a point in time where women are not just career-driven but are also conquering mountains as leaders in their own field—whether its media, art, church, family, school, businesses and more. 

With a fast-progressing number of women making an impact in a secular environment, known as the modern-day Babylon, I strongly feel that God is once again calling out all the young women in His church to be "like a lily among the thorns." 

But what does God mean exactly? What does it take to be one?

Five Characteristics 
of the "Lily among the thorns"

REAL TALK: Insecurity Guard

Once, I hated my lips.

As a kid, I used to despise how pout-y it was (and still is) compared to the others' normal ones.

My dad fondly teased me for my pout-y lips and gave me the name "Nguso,” –which was (according to him) his form of lambing to me, but sometimes

REAL TALK: What time is the Right Time?

"In the right time"

"When the time is right"

“In His time”

However you choose to say it, we all kind of end up impatiently groaning at the taking-forever act of waiting—from grumbling through the traffic lights, complaining in MRT lines (or should it still be called a line?) to praying for the end of sorrow or the fulfillment of success.  Especially now that we have come to a point in society or time where almost any information we want, can be acquired or Google-d in just a matter of seconds (probably depending on how strong your Wi-Fi is), also where communicating is as quick as real time, no matter how far the distance is from one point to another, thanks to FB or Twitter or texting or WeChat or Viber or Line or Email and the list goes on and on and on…and on—unlike the snail mail era where it takes almost a month for the letters to be sent!

We also even live in a credit card philosophy that says: "Get it now. Pay later."—that is pretty much like "Go for it now. And let’s see the consequences later." Not such a good value.

In a world full of ‘instant,’ it feels as though

REAL TALK: Fear Not, Worrywart

You will keep in perfect peace
    those whose minds are steadfast,
    because they trust in you.

Isaiah 26:3

As a self-confessed worrier, I’ve always been in a quest of understanding on how to attain God’s peace. I have this unexplainable tendency to overthink that I create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. I overthink in one aspect that could affect the whole other parts of my life. Am I not the only one?

There have been just so many worries and doubts haunting my mind lately.  It seems that in real life, everywhere you look there is always something to worry about, you go to the office and you see people you don’t get along with that you cringe in fear, you stare helplessly at the overflowing pile of tasks beside your desk and you feel overwhelmed and discouraged, then on the other note you start to deal with trust issues  with the people around you, and things get so complicated as you live on—and if you had one wish to be granted, it would be God’s peace in you and in your life.

But what does it mean to permanently have God’s peace? Does it mean you’ll never grieve? Does it mean you’ll never worry? Does it mean you would never feel bad again? Because I do hate those feelings, I hate

REAL TALK: De-cluttering My Life: My art of letting go and moving on

It’s about time to say good bye to those messy-dirty gray areas in your life that hinder you from better things that await you. Let me quote a very famous quote by all our beautiful (and angry) mothers—“CLEAN UP!!!!!!”

By the time this article is published, it has already been almost a year since I became a working girl. And boy, it does mean I am getting more and more MOOLAH-OH-LA-LA—thus, my love for fashion and shopping has gone to a much higher level, from tianggian to Forever 21! (Hihihi!)

Every month, I would make it a point to reward myself with two or three new dresses. But whenever I would come home to my closet to hang my precious newly-bought possessions, it seems that I just can’t find space for it. 

For some stressful reasons, my closet looks like a DANGER-DANGER-DO-NOT-ENTER zone with all the mess—old clothes, balled-up childhood dresses, rejected t-shirts, and stuff that I haven’t even worn for years all piled and overflowing that I can’t seem to ever close my closet door again. A total nightmare.

I've been told that excessive clutter is often a symptom/cause of stress that can affect every aspect of your life. It could reach a point where it distracts you, weighs you down, and invites more chaos. Then it all boils down to you getting stuck in a decision where the only right answer is to start cleaning up, getting rid of old stuff, and finally creating more room for new blessings.

So I hit it where the magic begins—de-cluttering my closet!

Are there monsters in your closet?

LEARN THE ART OF LETTING GO

While I was in the process of cleaning up my closet, I suddenly realized

REAL TALK: Got Bullied? Me too.

The ugly truth is that I have been the butt of people’s jokes when I was younger—I had my hair pulled until I was forced to crawl in the floor, I ate lunch alone, and I've been called the most hurtful names that my flaws were all out, feasted and made fun of by people. Yes, I've been bullied.

I was once a target and I think I know firsthand what it is to feel alone and to completely hate myself. I knew how it is to wake up every single day and dread the thought of having to deal with hurtful words and rejection. I hated the feeling of having to walk home miserable and I just couldn't tell my parents how bad my day went because I didn't want them to get involved in it. I cried myself to sleep every night. I faced this battle alone.

If you ask me why I was bullied, I never really knew why. Girls would call me fat and ugly. They would call me stupid. They didn't think I was cool or pretty enough, so they stopped talking to me.

I was such a loner to the point that